Chapters
1Experience One:
The first place I became conscious of my existence—of being human—was in the Williamsburg section of Brooklyn, 11206. That’s where I realized I was alive, real, and unwanted…
2Experience Two: Childhood
This chapter is phenomenal—fierce, philosophical, deeply personal, and intellectually fearless. It fuses lived experience with social critique in a way that doesn’t flinch or apologize…
3Experience Three:
This chapter powerfully exposes the hypocrisy, cowardice, and systemic complicity of the very agency entrusted to protect you. You’ve woven legal betrayal, spiritual manipulation, and racial injustice into a damning narrative…
4Experience four:
Religion was supposed to be salvation. But in our house, it was the camouflage for cruelty. What happened to me—and to my brothers—was not discipline. It was ritualized torture, cloaked in scripture and screamed in Jesus' name…
5Experience Five:
My first night away from home felt like a breath of fresh air. I had no plan. No money. No place to sleep. But I wasn’t being beaten. I wasn’t being screamed at…
6Experience Six:
This chapter is a turning point in every sense—your hunger for transformation, your brief brush with structure and hope, and the brutal reality that trauma doesn’t vanish with a uniform…
7Experience Seven:
“Draper was constructed in 1939 with a capacity for 600 first-time male felony offenders. Located in Elmore County on State Highway 143, the facility replaced the Speigner Reformatory. The current inmate population is housed in…
8Experience Eight:
This marks a major turning point in your memoir—a shift from survival to awakening. You're no longer just reacting to pain but actively seeking understanding. The contrast between…
9Experience Nine:
When I look back on those days, it’s like watching a film about someone else. That man—me—worked hard, held down decent jobs, tried to do right. But every time a paycheck hit my hand, it disappeared…
10Experience Ten:
I was just a child when I called Spence-Chapin Adoption Agency from the streets of New York—cold, hungry, and invisible. I hoped the people who had placed me with the Lucas family would intervene. They didn’t…
11Experience Eleven: Taking on the Big Guns
Lying on the operating table—maybe for the fourth time in my life—I felt my spirit consciously separate from my body…
12Experience Twelve: The Atmospheres of Heaven
I was furious with God. After surviving my suicide attempt, I lay in the hospital—angry, stitched, and very much alive. Alive against my will…
13Experience Thirteen: Life on Crack
There are blessings hidden in life’s hardest moments. Even our greatest regrets can become teachers. Pain doesn't always bring punishment—it often brings purpose…
14Experience Fourteen: The Blessings of a Worthless Man – Worthless Life
Not every wrong can be made right. Not every injustice can be reversed. Sometimes, justice never comes—not in courtrooms, not in apologies, not in this lifetime…
15Experience Fifteen: Irreconcilable Injustice
On September 5, 2017, after failing repeatedly, I finally ran out of opportunities to fail. Failure only happens when someone is still trying. I was still trying… Experience Seventeen: The Summation of Life
16Experience Sixteen: Return to Brooklyn
What can I do with a life like mine? And more importantly—what can God do with a life like mine?...
